Temperatures are set to soar into the high 80's today as Britains barmy weather takes another meandering turn on it's journey into Spring.
But scientists have deduced that the temperature won't be 80 degrees farenheit, nor 80 degrees celsius, it will simply be the "high 80's". Expect to see shell suits, permed hair, diamond encrusted gloves (on one hand only), pastel colours and sports jackets with rolled up sleeves.
Music may also be affected, with some radio stations automatically belting out "Hold The Line" by Toto and "Billie Jean" by Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink.
Traffic likely to be unaffected, but television programming will suffer a huge loss in broadcast quality.